The goal of this page is really just to increase understanding… so when you see these terms around this blog, you can know a little more of what I’m talking about.
The best husband: I mean, I feel like this one is self explanatory, but if you know me, you know I rarely leave things at that. As I write this in May of 2017, we’ve been married for nearly seven and a half years. I could write a lot about the things that this man of mine is not, in order to reassure you that he’s just as human and flawed as your husband. But that feels unfair to him – to list out all his flaws and failures here in one place. They’ll inevitably be laced throughout the stories I share in this blog. The thing that makes him best to me is that he shows up. He comes, as he is. He brings his truth and he holds space for me to share mine. He never, ever gives up on me. I’m never too much for him, and he doesn’t let me believe I’m not good enough. He sees me, and loves me anyway. He encourages me and helps me, and he makes sure I know that I’m never alone to face any of the things in life that might overwhelm me.
The brave boy: He’s my son. He’s nearly five years old as I write this in May of 2017. He’s always willing to try things. He’s quick to anger and quick to verbalize it. He’s open minded, though, and is also quick to adjust his sails and change his physical direction even when it takes the posture of his heart longer to actually shift. He is all things stereotypically boy. He plays hard, all the sports, climbing trees, skateboarding, biking, boogie boarding, wave jumping. He’s almost always barefoot and dirty. He embodies courage and freedom.
The brilliant girl: She’s my daughter. She’s six years old as I write this in May of 2017. Six and a half, she would correct me. She started speaking in logical, challenging paragraphs about the same time she got teeth, started walking, and eating solid foods. She’s a warrior woman through and through. She is a logical and philosophical force to be reckoned with. She’s naturally as smart as can be, and also values learning, so she’s just brilliant in the smart sense of the word, but she also radiates beauty, so she’s brilliant like a gem, too.
The healing place: This is the non-church church community that found us in 2014. The first time we came in this place, we stood in the back, unsure where to sit, and watched people dance and sing and sway… and joy and hope washed over us. We stood holding our kids who seemed to be the most physically at peace I’d ever experienced them, and we both just cried. This place has not just taught me about healing, but also been part of healing me. The people of this place have shown me Ruach, and that breathed life into my once stale concept of salvation. It’s painfully imperfect, as all churches (and non-church titled entities) are. But it’s real. And I showed up, angry and hurting at first, but willing to be there. Soon after, I showed up with my presence. I let myself be fully there. And I brought with me the grace to let other people be imperfect in their representation of God. I know I’m capable of completely missing the mark, and so are they. They’re worth love, and so am I. This is freedom.